Summer is over!

Well...summer vacation is over. For this little Harder family. We are beginning our trek back to Wyoming! Ryan is taking off in the morning, with the tundra PACKED, pulling a Uhaul and the boys and I will be following in a couple of days with a loaded outback.

Ahhhhhhh. The joys of moving again, and again, and again.

This time! We are moving to Cody! We found an affordable little house with a fenced in back yard! We are ridiculously excited. Unfortunately this means that Ryan will be commuting....fortunately this means we will be living in a town with a hospital (a normal sized hospital with an ER), grocery shopping options! Crazy, I know. A pediatrician IN town! A pool (you have no idea how excited I am about this), our church! We are super excited to have the opportunity to be involved in the community with our church. AND!!!! We will only be an hour away from the east gate of Yellowstone. ONE HOUR ladies and gentlemen.

I feel like this summer went by really fast, I still haven't made it to the beach! Dang it. Maybe this fall....or winter...or next summer? Between working, running around visiting friends, getting used to being mommy of three and still maintaining my status as super wife ;) this summer has simply flown by. It's been wonderful to be around family but I am looking forward to returning to Wyoming. I feel at home there. I am so unbelievably blessed to be able to live there, Ryan teaching over there allows me to be a stay at home mom! I'm so thankful for that. It is such a gift to be able to be home with the boys and take care of my little family. It is such a huge sense of accomplishment to be able to put a meal down in front of all my men. I understand the joy that my mom felt while we were growing up...and the frustration at times.

While we are so very excited to get over to Wyoming, it sucks to leave those we love behind. Having such a short time back at "home" makes it a lot easier to really invest our time with those we love and are supportive of us during our ups and downs. The last five...six years have really shown those people that we can count on and look to for support, advice and prayers. We are so thankful for those people in our lives.

So much love and prayer for you all.

Last post?? A couple of posts ago?? I left a verse Exodus 14:14 "The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent." I don't know why it took me so long to keep reading...because what follows is perfection. Verse 15 The Lord said to Moses, "Why do you cry to me? Tell the people of Israel to go forward."

So. Here's to walking forward with the Lord. Into what is unknown to me but on a path that He has made straight. (Proverbs 3:6).

Sooooo....it's been a while.

I keep having all of these wonderful ideas on different things to blog about. Everything from potty training tails to deep thoughts of my own. ; ) I can't even sit down to blog without feeling overwhelmed by all that I could share!! Right now I'm simply enjoying a quiet moment before bed, thankful for air conditioning! I forgot how humid it can get here (nothing like the south) but my word, the air just feels thick after being in Montana and Wyoming.

The boys are amazing. Rytan just turned three on the sixth. That child is nothing but joy and giggles. Occasional freak out, sure, but that just happens when he's tired. I can hardly believe it has already been three years since he entered our lives. It is amazing to watch him with his brothers, he absolutely adores his big brother and wants to do everything (and I really do mean everything) that Ryne does. He's pretty sure he's perfectly capable to do all things that are presented before him. Fortunately he still loves to snuggle, he will grab my face with both hands and tell me I'm his favorite (in that moment) and then give me a huge kiss.

Ryne is so excited about life!! Constantly ready for a new adventure, whoever is doing SOMEthing, he's sure he needs to tag along and help. He loves running around the yard, riding his bike, jumping in and out of the little pool, riding the little ATV. Daddy has taken the big boys fishing a couple of times this summer and they are hooked! There have been two nights this summer that the boys have chatted in their room after going to bed, every other night Ryan or I will take them in and read a book, pray with them and we do not hear a peep! Ryne also likes to tell people that his plan is to have two more babies...in case you hear this! Please know it is NOT true. But, we are incredibly thankful that he loves his brothers so much he could go for two more.

Rygby is three months! He's growing and changing every day, seriously, he is. He's a smiley, happy go lucky guy! Until someone other than mommy holds him...not entirely true but he is definitely a mama's boy! I love it. He wakes up incredibly happy in the morning, chatty as all get out and smiles. He greets his brothers with big smiles and his whole body flails around with excitement.

Being a parent absolutely comes with it's struggles but I'm so thankful for these beautiful boys and the gift of being mommy. Every day I'm blown away by them and God's love and grace for all of us!!!!

Ryan is doing really well, finally over his terrible, awful summer cold. Yay allergies making everything worse! June had most everyone sick and me running around like a crazy person unable to make sense of the days because we have no routine! I, apparently, thrive on routine and without it have almost no idea what day it is or what is going on in our lives.

I want to leave you with a verse that I have found incredibly encouraging over the last couple of weeks! I hope it blesses you the same way it has me.

The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent.
Exodus 14:14

Be encouraged sweet friends! Rest in His goodness and faithfulness. Let His grace and peace wash over you.

Confessions of a not super mom.

Soooooo.....this post might be a little scattered and spastic at times. My punctuation might become lacking (or simply start that way) and I hope you will forgive me. I'm going to take a lot of freedom to share here because I am preeeeeeeeeeeetty sure there are not a lot of people who read this...and those who do, bear with me. :)

Let me start with: I have a phenomenal husband (he's human and broken but he loves Jesus first and then myself and the boys.) I have three beautiful boys, I am so thankful God has entrusted them into our care and that we get to be the ones to raise them up. My quiver is full. :) There is a little saying that goes, if you think my hands are full you should see my heart. Yup!

Over the last couple of years there has been some confusion over myself and the use of the term "super mom." I have been accused (cannot think of the right word to use here...) of not getting angry, sad, or frustrated. There have been times in my life where I have felt unable to be sad, that even though I felt it I would be doing a disservice to those around me should I show it. I remember people saying to me over the last 15 years or so that they can't imagine me sad or angry. I do not think I need to walk around crying and screaming at people to get my point across, but it feels weird to hear these things. Someone who I love told me just yesterday that she couldn't imagine me feeling either of those emotions.

Those of you who have walked with Ryan and I over the last ten years know that we have had our own frustrations. My heart has broken watching my husband work incredibly hard to take care of our family, start a new career path at 30 and continue to believe that God would use him. We have moved so many times I get confused thinking about it, especially when I'm tired... I am fiercely protective of my husband and whenever there is even the possibility of my husband being hurt my hackles go up and I'm immediately on the defense. I cannot imagine why anyone would try to hurt him. Ryan is one of the hardest working people I know, amazingly loyal and has the most beautiful heart I have ever come across. I'm completely blessed by that man and am so thankful that God created him just for me. That being said we are still human, we still sin, and I very often fall short of the grace God has given me.

Ryne, Rytan and Rygby. Say that three times fast when you are tired, hungry and in desperate need of a nap. Or at least another cup of coffee. Three amazingly wonderful little boys. Rygby has only been in our life for just over two months and it's amazing how quickly he has engrained himself in our lives. Our family is complete (we really are NOT having more kids unless God decides otherwise...) Ryne will be five in October and Rytan is turning three in just a couple of weeks!! Our life is flying by and I'm blown away by it. The oldest two are incredibly spirited little boys, full of enthusiasm for life and a determination to do things in their own way. They keep me on my toes, remind me to relax, and embrace all that they are and who God has made them. I'm so looking forward to watching all three of them becoming young men. I struggle. I fail as a mom daily. I get upset with them when they are simply learning about life and being completely normal kids. I need to slow down more. I need to embrace the innocence of who they are more. I need to pray more! For them, for their future spouses, for their teenage years (completely horrified by those years already), for their friends. I cannot take out my frustrations in life on them. And sometimes...when I'm tired...I do.

There are some days where I feel like a phenomenally awful mom, a crappy wife and a person with no direction or purpose. I get angry and don't know what to do with it. I like to think that I'm a good listener (I really do hope I am), I love being able to walk with people through life and their highs and lows. But sometimes when I have quite a few people share with me at the same time (I'm SO thankful for people's confidence in me) and my heart gets heavy and I don't always know how to deal with it. I pray and do my best to hand it over to God and walk away. But it can be difficult. Sometimes I let other peoples problems get the better of me. Please don't hear this as me not wanting to hear what is going on in your life...because I totally do!!! But know that from now on I'm going to pray with people a lot more, while I'm sitting with you. Mostly because I need to. ;)

So that's about it...I'm trying, I fail. I love, but not always well. I'm broken, but God is healing those hurts. I'm a sinner, but He has forgiven me.

For who is God, but the Lord?
And who is a rock, except our God--
the God who equipped me with strength
and made my way blameless.
Psalm 18:31

The Lord is gracious and merciful,
slow to anger and abounding in steadfast love.
Psalm 145:8

We got to go to one of our favorite places last weekend, Joseph, Oregon. It's beautiful. Pictures don't do it any kind of justice. If you have the opportunity to go there, take it!! And go to Arrowhead chocolate shop...get a dark chocolate mocha. They give you a spoon smothered in chocolate!! SO GOOD. Below are a few pics of the boys enjoying the cabin, the first two are from Greybull, but Ry was hosing down the end of a fire and the big boys got all excited and ran around (mostly) nudie for a bit. It was hysterical. A super relaxing time, we simply enjoyed being up there, except for the allergies. ;)

SO! My goal for writing once a week has been totally busted less than two months into this project! But I'm going to blame it on having a baby and moving from Wyoming back to Oregon for the summer...and being exhausted! From wonderful things!!
Since I last posted Ryan has finished a great year in Greybull teaching, we packed up our house, said "see you later" to our Wyoming friends, and driven over to Hood River for a summer of fun and grandparents! The drive with the boys went as well as I could have hoped for! (The littles and I headed over a few days before Ryan was done teaching.) The big boys did great entertaining each other and not pestering Rygby too much...Rygby did amazing for his first big trip! Only complained the very last two hours while we were making our way through Oregon. Close to a thousand miles put on our Tundra that was packed to the MAX, our storage unit is about half the size it was last summer so we brought a little extra back to Oregon.
The boys are a liiiiiiiiittle spastic right now and beyond excited about being near grandparents for more than two months! It'll take a bit for them to get used to being back by family again. Everyone's loaded up on their allergy meds and we are getting used to breathing air that has moisture in it!!! As well as LOTS of pollen, cottonwood fluffs are out and about. But we wouldn't trade any of it. Rytan is SO excited to have his puppies back! I got home from work yesterday and Ryan and Ron had the big boys on ATV's riding around the field. I took all of the boys down to my parents store and the way they run around that place you would think they own it. ;)
It is SO nice to be back in the store, shoes everywhere, people going on adventures, PEOPLE!! I have missed chatting with adults throughout the day. I love my boys and don't to miss out on anything, I hate missing moments, but I am so thankful to be able to hang out with my parents in one of my favorite places. Some pictures below of fun moments!! The pics are all about a month old...but I'll post more later!!

It's May!!!

April went by really fast!!! Welcome to May! April 2014 was likely the most exciting April the Harder family has had, opening with a BANG and finishing with some more grandparent time. Ryan's parents, Ron and Linda, are at this very moment in Wyoming on their way to the pool with our big boys and Ryan. (So bizarre that we have big boys and a new boy still.)
I wonder when our "normal" will ever be normal for more than a week, or less, at a time. I am fairly confident that it will in fact never happen and that our normal will be forever changing and God will constantly be changing our lives will always be new and exciting. Which I will forever be thankful for! Who needs a mundane life?!? I surely don't.
Ryan had a delayed spring break this year (it was wrapped around Easter) much to our delight and blessing! Since my mom left he has been able to stay at home with the boys and I, while I heal and we adjust to being a family of FIVE!! So crazy. He has taken the boys into Cody (an hours drive) multiple times to swim and to go to church each week, which is a wonderful time for the three of them and a blessing to this mama as I get a little quiet and can vacuum and clean the house a bit! He is going back to work on Monday though and I'm a little terrified!!! I feel very capable in my mommy capabilities but AH! We are going to be spending LOTS of time at the park and simply going outside, the boys have discovered that underneath the porch is a pretty exciting place. It's about two feet high and I would think would make them slightly uncomfortable, but they spent two hours under there the other day digging and burying things. Rygby was sleeping and I sat with my feet up reading a book in the sun! It was quite lovely.
The senior Harder's arrived on the 30th and will be taking off Sunday to get back to Hood River, the boys were so excited to have more of their grandparents coming to visit them! AND they brought play-doh! You can always win our boys over with play-doh. They went for a four mile bike ride yesterday (the adults walked) and went down for an easy nights sleep as soon as their heads hit the pillow. I vacuumed up play-doh crumbs and hung back to let Rygby have a solid nap. We love being in Wyoming, LOVE, but man it's nice to have grandparents around!! And over the last month we have been spoiled by both sides of the family.
Three weeks from today Ryan will be closing up his first year of teaching in Greybull, our house will be packed up and our boys will more than likely be asking every five minutes when we are going to head back to Oregon. Our house is owned by some very lovely people who own a hotel that is right down the block, they rent it out over the summer nightly/weekly for just a tad more than what we pay for rent. SO, we get to spend our summer in Hood River surrounded by family and friends! I think we are all super excited for summer weather, time at the beach, the cabin, and being around our people. I'm excited for latte's....and our dogs!!! Rytan is ready to have our dogs in the back of the truck. He gets a little envious when he sees ranchers driving around with their working dogs (he starts asking if he can have his puppies in the back of our truck and signs/says please about twenty times.)
The weather has turned again, back to happy and warm, we are excited!! Makes it a lot easier to take the boys outside. ;)

Three boys!!!

God has blessed us with three beautiful boys! I am in awe! I am in shock!! I am so unbelievably thankful!!
April 8th came somewhat suddenly (even though I was very anxiously awaiting it), Ryan and I were up well before the sun was and we headed into Cody to greet our third boy. My mom had flown in the day before to help out post surgery and she had an awesome morning with our big boys! The surgery went so very smoothly (and really fast!!) and all of a sudden our beautiful Rygby Joshua was out in the world and 7 pounds 7 ounces, 21" of Harder boy perfection. The Cody hospital was fabulous, the nurses and doctors were all wonderful and we had a great experience. Thankful that God provided us with the team that He did. We were in the hospital for a short two days and while it was nice to begin recovery in the hospital, I so missed my boys!
Coming home was nothing but joy! The boys were so excited to have their baby home (the first night I was in the hospital Ryne asked if I was coming home, when he discovered I wasn't he asked if they could take Rygby home with them.) Ryg hasn't quite figured out how to stay awake during the day for longer than about 30 minutes at a time...so, lots of naps for him!! The big boys are adjusting well and just seem to be rolling right along with the fact that we have a new person living with us.
My mom, Karen, left yesterday to go home after an awesome nine days with us, so thankful that she was able to come and help while we adjusted to a brand new baby, she made dinners, helped me clean, did laundry! Such a blessing to have my mom around. Ryan starts his spring break today, they wrap it around Easter which is a great thing for us this year!, and he will continue staying home with us through the end of the month. SO thankful! I feel pretty dang awesome after having surgery but two busy boys and a newborn is a taaaaaaad much and slightly daunting at this moment. Ryan's parents will be joining us at the very end of the month for a few days. It is so nice to have family come over!
Below are a couple pictures from the hospital, some of mom's last day, and a "photo shoot" of the brothers yesterday on an unmade bed. It's slightly ridiculous trying to get pictures of the big boys with Ryg, trying to make sure they don't jump on him or kill each other in the meantime. It makes for a LOT of blurry pictures. They are still adorable and I love them!!! (Ryne asked why I took a picture of Rygby's back...because it is so beautiful and wrinkly.) I hope you enjoy them!!